Books

Seven Things I’m Doing

May 17, 2013 by Rhonda 6 Comments

1. Shopping at Aldi.

Ode to Aldi! Obviously I haven’t been living life to the fullest, because I just discovered Aldi. If you already know and appreciate the wonders of Aldi, you understand my escalating idol worship of this store. If you (alas) live where there is no Aldi, or if you, like me, kept away from Aldi for far too long due to prejudice, routine, or whatever, you are missing out.

Missing out on what, you ask? THE PRICES, people! Good gravy, I can afford to eat the way I’m supposed to eat, shopping at Aldi!

It’s no big deal to turn around every time I drive to the store and drive home to retrieve my forgotten bags and shiny quarter for the cart. For you, Aldi, I will make that sacrifice.

I have a strange and particular diet due to food allergies and other weird health issues. The food I can eat is largely limited to meat, produce, GF grains and starches, beans, rice milk, goat milk products now that I’m pregnant, and specialty food items that tend to be expensive (especially as we’re lacking a Trader Joe’s in this neck of the woods). And because I’m not particularly interested in cooking separate meals every night, we all eat this way. You know what that means: cha-ching! cha-ching! cha-ching!

But at Aldi, I can get produce – good produce! – at half the price of Meijer. We’re looking at a difference of several hundred dollars a month. Exclamation point!

“But,” (I hear the protests), “Aldi doesn’t have what I want! It’s junky! Just another example of Monsanto evil!”

Here’s where I enter my defense: If you are deeply, deeply committed to buying non-GMO/organic/free-range/locally grown food 100% of the time, you will not like Aldi. Aldi is not for you. Aldi is chock-full of the processed crap that gets passed off as nutrition in this country, junk that I have to work around myself. And, yes, Aldi is distinctly lacking in no free-range eggs or organic meat or non-GMO cereals, because they are all about being cheap-cheap.

I think I’ve made my peace with God and Mother Earth on this one. Is it better, morally, to eat food that’s been grown in a sustainable manner? Yes. But, frankly, I can’t afford it. To eat as I’m required to eat AND eat 100% organic would double our food bill, and, given that my husband already works above and beyond to pay our bills (someday, honey, I’ll write that bestseller… ha), I cannot morally justify us eating the way I’d ideally like to eat. But by shopping at Aldi, I can now afford to eat in a way that maintains my health. For us, this is the moral choice.

Defense over.

2. Researching.

What happens when a new character plops into the middle of a story? New research and development. Golly, not what I was planning on, but, hey, I’m learning a lot about history of Russia, Hungary, Bulgaria, the Teutonic Knights, the Dominicans, the Tartar Invasion, the… the… the…

I’m lucky to be married to a college professor and to have access to a school library. Some writers do manage to do research without such a happy resource, but I’m glad I don’t have to. I love browsing college libraries! So much knowledge crammed into those dimly lit metal shelves!

The Brodnici (or Brodniks or Brodniki) have one shining (?) moment in history, one moment that I know now I need to work into the plot of my novel: They betrayed the Russians and joined the side the Mongols (Tartars) halfway through the Battle of the Kalka River in 1223, resulting in the sacking of Kiev and the death of three Russian princes, whose bodies their enemies feasted over – yes, laid a board on top of them and had a meal. Pretty gruesome stuff. After this they disappear from all Russian chronicles (not that they were there much before). Not the most noble moment in human history, but, hey, it’s important.

I can’t not include this, you know? But given that my first/second/twentieth synopsis pitted the story 40 years earlier, I’ve had to do quite a bit of research to adapt to my new time frame. Medieval history is a mess, and none more so than Russian history. Believe me on this one.

3. Reading Mysteries.

The great Agatha Christie, anyone? I just started The Murder of Roger Ackroyd. No spoilers, please!

4. Reading (bad) Historical Fiction and Getting Sucked In Nonetheless.

I’ll leave names out of this, for charity’s sake.

Someone recommended an author of historical romance whose books I found in our local library. I’m a sucker for historical romances – it’s the Jane Austen thing – and always willing to try out a new one. And Fabio was absent from the cover of each, so no bodice ripping. So far, so good…

…sorry to say, I’m both disappointed and completely hooked.

Let’s begin with disappointment. Taking that novel class has ruined me. Now I can’t read or watch anything without breaking it apart. Clear external goals and motivations? Clear antagonist based on those external goals? Plot points? No new information in the Third Act? Subplots? Too many characters? Too few?

The analytical would-be novelist is all over these books – in a bad way.

And yet I’m hooked. This author is one of those writers who has the knack of capturing both male desire and female desire to be desired, which is not bad in of itself except that it’s the type of romance-depiction that’s very easily transfered to the reader via a limited point of view. Think Twilight. Hello, emotional manipulation!

So, despite my rational analysis of this author’s various plot problems, I keep reading the dang thing, and what do I do? Pick up her other works from the library.

Yes, I’m a vice-ridden sucker.

This stuff is crack-cocaine, people. I don’t care if we’re talking about classics (The Scarlet Pimpernel) or books free-of-bodice-ripping published by a Christian publishing house. CRACK. My one-time spiritual director called romance novels “female p0rn.” I think he’s dead-on right.

What, then, in good conscience, does an author do? Love and marriage are all goods that ought to be celebrated in story and art. Nothing wrong with that. But how do we do this and even bring the reader into sympathy with our characters (including emotional sympathy) without turning our stories into emotional manipulation? How much of the burden is on the author, and how much on the reader to discern what is and is not good for her to read?

I don’t know the answer to this one.

5. Looking for book recommendations.

On that downer of a note, any recommendations?

I like historicals (obviously) and mysteries (see above), so long as they are light on the sex and the gruesome. I do like fast-paced espionage-esque plots (Bourne) but haven’t read much in the genre and have no idea where to start.

I also recently read and enjoyed my first non-Tolkien/non-Lewis fantasy novel, K.M. Weiland’s Dreamlander (her blog is fantastic), so I’m open to fantasy recommendations, provided that they aren’t of the “Hrudon, Son of Sankar, Prince and Overlord of Outer Cthandon” type (hat tip to Chris Baty for Hrudon. That name had me rolling on the floor laughing during the second week of our class’ NaNoWriMo).

6. Studying Language.

Now that the pace has slowed a bit (read: not writing at a breakneck speed), I’m back at the French! And… Spanish.

Why two? Because I’m nuts like that.

I’m taking next semester off for obvious reasons and plan on starting up again in January with French. Studying French worked so well the last time I was postpartum that I thought I’d try it again after the baby comes.

The Spanish, on the other hand, is a new-old inspiration. I wanted to learn Spanish when I was twelve, took it in high school, dropped Spanish 3 and haven’t really looked back, except for a weak moment or two where I thought I could both learn a language, keep house, and teach middle school full time. Ha. But I woke up the other morning in a half-daze, speaking Spanish, and I took that as a sign that I ought to think about another attempt at it.

This ain’t Arizona or Texas, but we hear Spanish spoken a lot here, even more than I heard it spoken in D.C., and I’m starting to catch every tenth word when I oh-so-discreetly eavesdrop on people while shopping and at church. Our parish is over fifty percent Spanish speaking (mostly Mexican) and I’m learning the Mass parts in Spanish. Opportunity has presented itself.

But… just to make it clear… I’m doing the language thing at a very, very slow pace. This post makes me sounds like I’m Superwoman. So not. We just don’t have a TV, that’s all.

7. Hiking.

We hiked the (short) trail at Saugatuck State Park the other day and, miracle of miracles, had a stretch of Lake Michigan coastline all to ourselves for about 15 minutes before another nice family showed up and nicely intruded on our nice nature moment. Then the sun came out a bit more and more people started arriving, so we high-tailed our introverted and melancholic selves home before we’d be forced to interact with other members of the human race.

I love hiking, and I’m so, soooooo happy the sun has decided to grace us with his presence so that we could get out. Speaking of snow, next winter I think I ought to take up snow-shoeing. Can one take a newborn snow-shoeing? Sounds precarious, but I’m game for anything. Winter makes a person desperate, don’t-ya-know.

(Linking up with Jen for the first time in ages. )

Filed Under: C'est Moi, Current Projects, History, House & Kids Tagged With: 7 Quick Takes, Aldi, bad books, Book Recommendations, Books, Brodnici, Children, Emotionalism, Family, Finances, food, Food Shopping, French, hiking, History, Languages, Link Ups, Michigan, money, Personal, Plot, Plot Problems, Politics, Research, Romance, Shopping, Spanish, the Problem of Romance, winter

Austen, Speare, or Something Else? Choosing a Mentor Novel

December 14, 2012 by Rhonda 5 Comments

Novelists out there: Ever been asked to choose a “mentor” novel?

The intensive novel writing class I begin soon requires that I choose a mentor novel. This is a novel that I have already read and loved for its style, genre, tone, plotting, humor, language, or whatever reason, and wish to emulate in some way.

Question is, what to choose? What novels are educative for the writer learning her craft?

I can say what will not work. My preference might be the Eliots and Tolstoys, but Middlemarch and War and Peace wouldn’t make good mentor novels. At least, good mentor novels for the likes of me. Why? They are too long and too complex. Normally, as a reader, I would consider these to be good qualities in a novel. Who doesn’t love delving into the delightful complexities of an epic masterpiece? But they fail as mentor novels because a writer would be hard-pressed to get their minds around the structure of those books. And getting our minds around the structure of a book is what having a mentor novel is all about.

That being said, I’m toying with two novels right now: Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice and The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare.

Pride and Prejudice is an easy, obvious choice. I love Austen’s novels and I know them well (maybe a little too well). She’s a master at characterization, and emulating her would also help me achieve my near-impossible goal of being funny (considering that I’ve boldly opined on the lack of humor in new Catholic literature). Perhaps, with Austen’s help, I’ll dream up another Mr. Collins?

Pinched from here.

One can only hope.

My one objection to using Pride and Prejudice is that it’s everyone’s mentor novel. Need proof? The Elizabeth Theory. Contemporary fiction has way, way too many Elizabeth knockoffs. Other than Shakespeare’s Beatrice (Much Ado About Nothing), I cannot think of a single female literary character prior to P&P with the temperament and talent of an Elizabeth Bennett. She became a type when she arrived on the scene – a beloved and much imitated type – and since then our female characters are measured according to the Pride and Prejudice standard.

My more pressing goal, however, is to work on plotting, and for that I can think of no better example than the Newbury Award winning novel The Witch of Blackbird Pond. That Disney hasn’t already turned it into a movie is surprising, considering its vast popularity with fifth-grade teachers. It’s a compelling and tightly written story set in colonial Connecticut, and the opening chapters are near perfection in its hook, establishment of the premise, characterization, scene structure, and foreshadowing. And, being a children’s story, the plot is easier to analyze. Kit is another Elizabeth Bennett type, of course, but otherwise it’d be a great book to imitate.

How about you? What novel (or book, for you non-fiction writers) would you choose as a mentor novel, and why?

Filed Under: Current Projects, Writing & Theory Tagged With: Books, Characters, children's books, Elizabeth George Speare, fiction, Jane Austen, literary, Novel, stories, storytelling, Writers, Writing & Theory

7QT: Flannery O’Connor, Social Ineptitude, and More

November 2, 2012 by Rhonda 6 Comments

1. Last week I forgot to link back to our gracious 7 Quick Takes hostess, Jennifer. To make up for such an atrocity:

There! Credit!

2. (In which she brown-noses:) For those of you who haven’t or don’t read Jennifer Fulwiler’s work, what the bageezes are you waiting for? She’s humorous, thoughtful, kind, and, as an atheist-to-Catholic convert, brings to her writing a perspective we in the Bubble don’t get every day. Besides, she’s self-avowedly a socially inept introvert and is therefore one of my heroes. Witness:

The ladies at church seemed startled when I climbed out of the window of my minivan.

When the driver’s-side door handle broke the week before, I decided to avoid the overwhelming task of getting it fixed by learning to live without a functioning car door. I was too tall to scoot over the seat and out the passenger side, but I grew up watching The Dukes of Hazzard and knew that entering and exiting vehicles through windows was a perfectly viable option…

You’ve probably guessed the punch line. Now add a complication…

Unfortunately, one of my first experiences with these realities occurred in front of my acquaintances from church.

…and you have a recipe for socially inept, introspective introverted comic GOLD. (Quote from Style, Sex, and Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter.)

3. I’ve mentioned before that I’m introverted, which comes as a surprise to some (okay, to all) who know me, because I’m a ramb-ler. By the babbling waters of Babylon, I sat down and babbled, babbled, babbled. Sigh. So a lot of people think I’m an extrovert. So not. Sometimes, when you let the introvert out of her introvert cave, she overwhelms others with every. single. thing. she’s. thought. for. the. last. eon. Plus, nerves. Bad combo.

That’s what happened today.

I was invited to a large mother’s group at a local church. Normally I can’t stand these things; making small talk stresses me out to no end, I’d rather spend the time at home doing home things, and the very idea of a “mom’s group” seems so, I don’t know, culturally suburban. Bleh. But given that my son’s take-away impression of visiting local daycare centers was, “Other kids,” I’m thinking that maybe I need to make more of an effort. Besides, I was invited by a colleague of my husband’s, who, he promised, is very sweet (and she is).

Let me cut to the chase and turn my story (it was gearing up quite nicely, wasn’t it? See? Told you. Babbler.) into a summary and say: I babbled. And, at one point, babbled incoherently about something that, because I was incoherent, probably left a bad impression of me as a mom. Oh, and I blurted once.

So I’m sitting on my pity pot, beating myself up, once again, over my inability to communicate effectively with the rest of humankind.

The play group was otherwise awesome. We’ll be going again.

4. You know who else was socially inept? Flannery O’Connor.

Don’t be shocked. She says so herself.

Every Flannery Fanboy and Fangirl who also happens to be a Jesus-Catholic-Fanboy/Fangirl loves to quote the famous, “If it’s just a symbol, to hell with it!” defense of the Real Presence. People, sometimes priests, even try to recreate it, using her words in a planned attempt to be just as shockingly profane in defense of the sacred.

People, don’t. You can’t and shouldn’t recreate the momentary inspirations of the socially inept. And it was the response of one who was socially inept, as she says:

I was once, five or six years ago, taken by some friends to have dinner with Mary McCarthy and her husband, Mr. Broadwater. (She just wrote that book, A Charmed Life.) She departed the Church at the age of 15 and is a Big Intellectual. We went at eight and at one, I hadn’t opened my mouth once, there being nothing for me in such company to say. The people who took me were Robert Lowell and his now wife, Elizabeth Hardwick. Having me there was like having a dog present who had been trained to say a few words but overcome with inadequacy had forgotten them. Well, toward morning the conversation turned on the Eucharist, which I, being the Catholic, was obviously supposed to defend. Mrs. Broadwater said when she was a child and received the Host, she thought of it as the Holy Ghost, He being the “most portable” person of the Trinity; now she thought of it as a symbol and implied that it was a pretty good one. I then said, in a very shaky voice, “Well, if it’s a symbol, to hell with it.” That was all the defense I was capable of but I realize now that this is all I will ever be able to say about it, outside of a story, except that it is the center of existence for me; all the rest of life is expendable (Habit of Being: “To ‘A.’”, 16 December 55, pp.124-125, emphasis mine).

Flannery’s exact words were the fruit of her weakness. She was a woman who spent most of her days living in her head, except when she was (as is implied) dragged out and forced to mingle in smarmy New York faux-intellectual circles. Nervous, she couldn’t speak; when pressed, she blurted out that oft-quoted line – a socially-awkward blurt.

Humanly speaking, there are other ways of challenging the Mary McCarthys of the world to reconsider their positions – employing the Socratic method, perhaps, or simply charming the socks of the intelligentsia so that they can’t hardly believe such a charming person could be a faithful Catholic as well. (Cardinal Timothy Dolan comes to mind.) Those with social graces and the smarts to match find ways of defending the point with more ease and aplomb. I’m sure those around the table thought Flannery strange, and I doubt Mary McCarthy went away converted.

You can’t plan to say what Flannery said and have it be effective. You can, however, believe that Flannery, in that time and in that place, was graced to bear the cross of social awkwardness and the painful judgment of glittery salon in order for her words to resound beyond that situation as a moment of great Christian witness.

5. Does that make any sense? I’m afraid I’m not making my point clear. But these quick takes are getting a little less than quick (babbling again! Darn it!), and I need to wrap this up.

6. Smoked Paprika. Just. do. it.

Chicken + butter + agave nectar + smoked paprika + kosher salt + pepper. Roast. Baste a few times. Easy. Delish.

7. I promised my sister-in-law some pictures from Halloween:

With Brown Bear’s mitts. Enthused.

That’s all here. Go visit Jen.

Filed Under: C'est Moi, House & Kids Tagged With: 7 Quick Takes, bloggers, Books, Children, Flannery O'Connor, food, Link Ups, recipes, Writers

Michaelmas: Every Janeite’s Favorite Feast Day

September 29, 2012 by Rhonda Leave a Comment

Happy Feast of Saints Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael, the Archangels!

And to my fellow Austen enthusiasts, happy Michaelmas!

September 29, the feast of Michaelmas, was one of the four “quarter” days according to which houses were rented in Regency England. If you remember, the story of Pride and Prejudice begins with a young man “letting” Netherfield Park, bringing his unmarried self, his obnoxious sisters, and the equally-unmarried Mr. Darcy into the neighborhood. And the neighborhood – and Bennet home – rang with cries of, “Fresh meat! Fresh meat! At Michaelmas!“ (I’m paraphrasing.)

Austen mentions Michaelmas in other novels, but Mrs. Bennet’s excitement over the arrival of Mr. Bingley is certainly the most memorable.

More on the angels: Catechism of the Catholic Church, 328-336

Image Credit: WikiCommons